Yay. New blog dedicated exclusively to my pregnancy.
I have put together 10 tips/words of advice I believe a pregnant, single woman should know. (Of course this isn't limited to single expecting moms, but coming from a single expecting mom, this is what I find helpful.)
1. BE ACCEPTING, BE HAPPY!
Seriously, be happy. But first, you must accept this blessing because acceptance causes you to be content and being content allows happiness to flow. Pregnancy is such a beautiful blessing for you are creating YOUR child in YOUR body. Although you may have not planned or expected to be expecting, here you are. Understand life happens and be happy so you can share that happiness with your baby. You are not alone, you have your baby inside you for the next 40 weeks.
2. FIND A PREGNANCY PARTNERFind someone you feel comfortable journeying with the entire pregnancy. YOU ARE NOT LIMITED TO ONE PREGNANCY PARTNER! It is very helpful to have (a) partner(s) because trust me, pregnancy is such an emotionally and physically draining ride. You are going to NEED someone who is there every step of the way.
I have a few preggo partners:
My dad is my eating buddy and pretty much my personal assistant. He gets me food/drinks at my request, he eats everything with me, we spend the most time together.
My mom and friends are my go-to with pregnancy advice; anywhere from talking about what labor really feels like (thanks Bea), to talking about breast feeding (thanks Chels), to talking about balancing life/work/baby (thanks Haley), to talking about my prenatal process (thanks Kiela), to encouraging me to stay fit during pregnancy (thanks Kandyce), to making me keep growing (thanks Barb), to making me cheese rolls and frito pie (thanks Aisha), to going to my FIRST appointment with me (thanks Mel), to making me so damn happy about my pregnancy (thanks Vitalia), to making me laugh (thanks Grams), to telling me so much cute stories (thanks mom). Support is VITAL in pregnancy.
3. JOURNAL
I created an email for my baby and emailed almost daily. After awhile, daily emails were too demanding and I didn't email for about two months until I started to again. This time I decided to email once a week to tell my baby about his/her progress. I figured it would be much better because who knows how much time my baby will spend reading daily emails- weekly seemed more appropriate. Anyways, this is my way of "journaling" my journey. Not only am I writing down my thoughts and feelings each week, I am giving my baby the chance to read what I was going through during their creation. This is also a means of teaching my son (if its a boy) how difficult pregnancy is for a woman so he will support his partner. AND/OR it is also showing my daughter (if it is a girl) that pregnancy is difficult but not impossible, which brings me to...
4. "YOU'RE PREGNANT, NOT DYING"The special thing about women is they can do everything a man can do while carrying a baby in their stomach.
Don't give up that dream you have. You still have an entire life to live!!! You can still accomplish your dreams with baby in womb or baby on hip. Don't give anything up with the sorry excuse you can't because you are a going to be mom!
5. STAY FITAgain, you're pregnant, not dying. You can walk, you can stair climb, you can bike, you elliptical, you can lift lightly, you can Pilates, you can yoga, hell you can do pretty much anything your Dr. says is fine as long as it doesn't pose a risk to your baby. I AM NOT A DR SO CONSULT YOUR DR FIRST but stay active. Walk 5 mins 5 times a day. Stretch. Keep fit and it may help during delivery and postpartum.
6. BE COMFORTABLE IN YOUR OWN SKINIn all honesty, this one may be the hardest. Trust me, I am slowly taking this piece of advice in for myself. Like myself, you may feel fat because you are filled with hormones. But listen here, you are not fat, you are pregnant. You are not fat, you are growing another life inside your body. You are not fat, those people are just ruthless and jealous. You are not fat, you are pregnant.
7. NEVER BE ASHAMEDYou are single and you are pregnant. Such a sad, depressing, shaming place to sit, right? TOTALLY WRONG! You are badass for continuing this pregnancy even without the father of your child. Why are you badass? Because you made a choice for you and your child. You decided you were WORTHY, READY and NOT ASHAMED lil mama.
8. LEARN TO FORGIVEFor whatever reason you may be single and pregnant, forgive the necessary people and move forward. In the case of a one night stand, forgive yourself. We are all human, you still have every capability to be a great mama. If, as in my case, your child's father decided he didn't want part of the baby's life, forgive him. Forgive him not just for him or for you, but for your child. Forgive him so you love your child fully for that baby is always going to be one half of him.
9. SEE THIS AS THE GREATEST OPPORTUNITY This is the greatest opportunity you could ever be presented with: the creation and raising of your own child. As a single mama, you are able to raise this baby how you want. You are able to love this baby as much as you want.
I have had many great opportunities in my short 22 years living, but this is by far the best one. I am so ready to raise this little baby to be a fearless female or a magnificent male.
Don't look at this as a misfortune but the complete opposite: an opportunity.
10. BE PROUDYour child WILL be proud of their mother. They will be proud of your accomplishments, your contribution to their accomplishments, and ultimately they will be proud of the way you loved him/her so be proud of yourself too!
